Efforts of a Minimalist – Wedding Theme

This happened late last year…

While at a family gathering:

Me: Tita#1, natuloy po ba yung kasal ni Cousin #1?

Tita#1: Oo. Pumunta ba kayo?

Me: Di naman po kami inimbita (not disappointed at all, just stating facts), kayo po pumunta?

Tita#1: Hindi rin kami inimbita…

Cousin #2: (Nakisingit sa usapan) Filipinana kasi ang motif, bakit may Filipinana ka ba? – referring to me (Filipinana dress he means).

Me: (Nairita bigla.) Kung kailangan ko magpatahi ng Filipinana gown at sumakay sa karwahe papunta sa venue ng kasal nya, gagawin ko… kung inimbita nya ako. Problema ko na yung pagsunod sa motif nya, pero hindi yun sapat na dahilan para hindi sya mag imbita.

Cousin #2, Tita #2,3,4 – (Di nakakibo.)

Tita #1 – Oo nga.

I felt so discriminated – more for my aunts and uncles, for the memory of my father and our grandparents – that the reason they are not invited was because their niece thought they cannot comply with her wedding motif. So shallow! – there, I just have to say it.

Yes, it may be her BIG DAY and I’m not in the position to question her choice of wedding theme… but does it really have to be the ultimate declared criterion for qualifying who will be on her guest list? I would rather take an immediate-family-members-only reason or just simply say “we’re limiting our guests because we’re on a tight budget” or just don’t announce it at all and we will just see you and your husband on our next family gathering.

It saddens me and at the same time irritates me that there are people who prefers to be flashy than polite and ostentatious than courteous.


– If only our grandparents knew you will do this to their chicldren, they should not bother to prepare UBE HALAYA and LECHON whenever your visiting.

– When did a sweetheart tube top laced ball gown and suit and bow tie combo becomes “Filipinana”?! I do my research you know. 😉




  1. This is sad. How did you know about the wedding? It’s fairly easy to comply with that theme. A simple dress and a cape looking thing of sorts. It’s sad that weddings result in families tearing apart. Stories I’ve heard one too many times

    • I learned it from her mom months before the day of the wedding and the date is kinda easy to remember. We’re not really close, so I’m not really expecting to get a real invitation but nevertheless I prepared a gift for them in case I got a “courtesy invitation”. I’m more on speaking/ranting for my aunts/uncles, they are the ones who really get discriminated.

  2. I only had 16 people at my wedding. Iniisip ko din nga if we are going to push through with a big-ish wedding, di ko na papahirapan friends and family. Ok na smart casual. We’re not a rich family and I don’t have rich friends either. Which means, it’s not in our lifestyle to fuss with over the top themed weddings

    • Same here, our wedding was well attended by family members and close friends, the effort of being with us on our special day is the greatest gift we expected from them, nothing more. Though there was a suggested attire,we didn’t fret about guests who came wearing polo shirts and more casual clothes. We value their presence more than how they will appear in the wedding album/video.

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